In high school, my interests would fluctuate on what kind of a career I would end up pursuing. “Hey, I’ll do art! Hey, I’ll try out music! I’ll take up psychology... Wait, maybe I’ll try Marine Biology!”. That never tends to work out as I had found myself losing interests or never finding the motivation, especially with the overwhelming excuses that clogged my mind at the time, with the inferiority complex that stays with me. So why have I managed to keep my interest with computer science? You see, it wasn’t until I took a Java class in high school that I then felt competent. There was something satisfying about managing to complete the tasks, it felt satisfying. The achievement led to comfort.
When I was met with the choice of a major, I chose computer science for the reason because I saw myself being competent at it. It’s not nursing or engineering because I saw myself surviving (or expected myself to survive). Even then, I’m still exploring my options. Whether it be data science, cyber security, web development, game development or software engineering. I’ve developed experience in each one, but not so much on the software engineering side if I may be honest.
Now that I am taking a software engineering class, I’m honestly expecting more “fine tuning” onto my skills and perceptions of programming. What I mean is, developing habits and abilities that would generate production and efficiency within a group. This would mean additional communicating, and more creativity being brought to the table. It’s all about sitting down with your neighbor, group or whatever and without care and going “so I got this cool idea…”.
Considering that I get social anxiety often, I hope to step more out my shell more in that regard. There’s this huge problem where I’d love to say something, or put something out there for a suggestion, but I don’t really think anything I say would be worth suggesting at times. It’s a big flaw that’s worth overcoming. Maybe at the end of the course, the anxiety leaves and the courage to suggest and communicate arises.